This will always strike me as perhaps the most promising recording of my time with the band.
The Hunger Artist came along a few months too late, as it ultimately fell victim to crumbling relations within the band. Originally intended as a formal presentation of the songs that were earlier recorded (and later released) as the Summer 2004 Wooden Walls demo, the tracklist was the first purely Softer-era release, as Lowfive-era hangers-on
1913 and
Calico (which were re-recorded during these sessions) had been clipped from the release. Additionally, nearly all of the songs had been written entirely with 1 incarnation of the band (
TNT having been started briefly in the Jason & Sean-era of Lowfive).
Another element of this project that i loved was that it was a concept release. All of the songs worked together and spoke to each other in a much more cooperative way than on any of our other records. As suggested by the title, the thematic elements (and album artwork) were influenced by Franz Kafka's short story "A Hunger Artist", which, when read as a companion, greatly enhances the potency of the album. This album was produced as a major component to my undergraduate honors thesis at Emerson (in conjunction with this website and the
1913 music video, as well as a lengthy thesis). Eventually/hopefully, a Softer project site will be published at
www.hungerartist.net which goes into more depth on the thematic & story elements, as detailed in the thesis.
Aside from the project falling to pieces and me quitting the band during the process, this is (ironically) the first band recording where i felt that everything was going right and clicking into place: the drum tracks were very solid performances, were high quality/multi-tracked to as many channels as we liked, and very easy to work with. Right there we'd already one-upped every previous attempt at recording, as practical or technical restraints usually led to acceptance of less-than-pristine drum tracks. Most of the songs were done in one or two takes and in very little time.
For the first time ever, we actually had extra time in the studio to play around, which proved invaluable to the integrity of this album as a concept work. Although the first plan for the album was to use
1913 and possibly
Calico as complements to the core of
TNT,
Confessions, and
The Hunger Artist, we actually had time to lay down the tracks to some brand new (to me) tracks that the band had been working on in Maine, and which were written specifically for the (eventually clarified) album theme. These were the first recorded versions of
Maine Will Kill Us All,
The Blessing Way, and
Aleatoria Prosa, as well as what could be considered an early demoing of
There Is Nothing New. I think the best (and easiest) way for me to explain all of this is to break the album down track-by-track.
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SONG-BY-SONG:
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01 -- There is Nothing New (part I)
As the title indicates, this is only half of the song that was eventually completed as
There Is Nothing New (later version was released on the
...Immaterialist EP the summer after i left the band). I think this song was still in its infancy when we started the project. From what i remember, we had just tracked drums for the rest of the songs, and had some free time left in the studio, so Gabe and Ian decided to run through this new song. During the guitar sessions, we couldn't track guitars for the 2nd half of the song as Gabe needed to hear the bass to do his parts. Additionally, Jon wasn't able to track his guitar parts for this half of the song because he needed Gabe's parts. I think Gabe did all of the guitars on this track, as he did some rough takes of Jon's parts until i could get some of Jon playing, which unfortunately never happened. As we never recorded bass for the record, and really didn't do any more sessions after guitars, this basically left a bunch of lonely drums in the 2nd movement of the song. As a matter of practicality, i cropped the 2nd part off, and did my best to segue into
Confessions. As this was a brand new song, i never heard the vocals or vocal melody, and my parts and the final mix probably don't reflect the song in its true form. Although i'm happy with the soundscape created here, i am curious to see how the song would have played differently with all of the parts.
02 -- Confessions of an Ardent Heart
This was among the more seasoned tracks we recorded, plus we had also done a prior demo recording. Naturally, i had an idea of what the song should sound like. Drumming went swimmingly and perhaps sound the best out of the bunch. Although we were never able to record bass for the track, i played a placeholder line with my roommate's keyboard, which was a (slightly) better quality than any of the Casios i had been using up to this point. While the intro part really should be replaced by bass (as in the true version of the song), that melody became a refrain for the album, and really brought the whole album together when used as in a music box version as an outro. Although i was rushed to get parts recorded (as this was part of a studio recording project for school), i still managed to get really great key/synth tracks with relatively little effort. I was much more happy with the performances and the sound of these tracks than of those on the earlier demo. Part of it was that i had better instruments available, and part was just the ease and convenience of the setup. On top of all was probably my ability to experiment with different sounds and the unlimited tracks for alternate takes and experimentation. I still have a few parts i would like to add to the song that would help bring it to some degree of instrumental rest, as it still is lacking vocals and some crucial guitars and bass.
03 -- Aleatoria Prosa
Another brand new song to me, i originally had no grasp on this song. I struggled to picture it in my head, as i'd never heard the full instrumentation. I believe i know the vocal melody, and i do have the lyrics, but really no impression of the song as it was ever played by the full band. My parts were written based solely upon rhythm guitar and drum tracks, and originally i hated it. Three years later, and i still find the song one of the most interesting (perhaps because it's still "new" to me). Like many of the other tracks on the album, i have some great plans for additional instrumentation that may or may not pan out. Although originally presented to me as being conceptually tied to The Hunger Artist, Gabe later told me that although it fit, the lyrics were coming from a different place than the other songs. I believe this was a short-lived song in the band's repertoire, and was phased out of the setlist shortly after its introduction. I have my theories as to why, and i think it's unfortunate... which is ironic considering my initial dislike for the song!
04 -- Tourniquets and Treachery
Like
Confessions, this was a seasoned track with an existing demo. Basically, we all knew how the song should sound, and the goal here was to make a smoother and tighter version than what we had on the demo. Had we finished all of the recording, i believe it would have been exactly what i'd always envisioned for the song. Although we're still lacking some crucial guitar/bass tracks, this still rings to me as the best version of the song we have. I'm particular happy with the revised keys/synth parts, as they were particularly offensive on the original demo (Wooden Walls); part on account of a poorly chosen chords, and partly because of the lack of a good instrument. I'm much happier with the organ sound i had available for this recording, and i was much more comfortable with the Prodigy for this recording, as i'd owned it for a few months by this time. Particularly effective is the "breakdown" part of the song, which while demoed in a fit of noble inspiration, never was quite there on the original demo. I feel like i nailed it here.
05 -- Maine Will Kill Us All
This was yet another track that was brand new to me, although i had been given a preview of the lyrics before the original studio sessions. Additionally, i heard the vocals during the drum tracking sessions, as Gabe performed the rhythm guitar/vocals to help guide Ian through the tracking. This is quite a departure from the rest of the Softer catalogue, most notably for a tempo not seen since the Matt Deprez days of "sprint drumming". That said, i was quite pleased with it and felt it was easy to work with and would have been easy to finish up real nice. Again, i wrote my part with just the original drum tracks and rhythm guitar, but i think i was probably the most on target with my parts here, as i think the final instrumentation was fairly simple and rhythmic... EXCEPT for the really weird bridge parts; these were totally constructed by me in the studio out of multiple takes of raw instruments and no knowledge of the proper song structure. Originally it was a mess, but i'm very happy with the stuff as is, even if it is out of time and structure from the official version of the song. It's unfortunate that some of the problems never had a chance for repair, but the song still sounds pretty full (and then pretty angular!).
06 -- The Blessing Way
As the final brand new track of this session, i believe this song had seen a few miles by the boys up in maine, as it seemed to be the most rehearsed and developed of the bunch. Then again, it's a very slow and simple song (described to me as the song that would take the place of
The Atlantic Ocean in our catalogue). I'd also heard gabe working on this song a while back on his acoustic, so i believe it to be older than the other "new" songs. I did get some of Jon's crucial parts (most notably for this song), because he really came through for me and was able to stop time for a few days and crank out some guitars for me up at Wooden Walls (and expedite their shipping to me, to boot!). My instrumentation was simple, but i was very happy with it. After i recorded my parts, however, i wrote a part on a new instrument called a Suzuki Omnichord, which was reallllly nice and unique. I managed to play this live at my final show (in May 2004), but have yet to track out the part. This is, in part, due to the fact that i really like the sound of the song as is, and i'm worried that i'll really love the take but it won't work for the song's benefit in the end. One of these days when i get the ambition to make another pass at finishing this beast, i will put my theory to the test.
07 -- The Hunger Artist
Originally intended as a hidden title track at the end of the album, this was separated from the other tracks by a refrain of the
Confessions bassline by a distant music-box, then a short period of silence. i have perhaps the least instrumentation for this track: just drums and Gabe playing his part as well as a modified version of Jon's part (he wasn't sure of the exact way that Jon played his). Strangely, i think the sparseness of the mix makes it much more effective. I purposely didn't record any keys for this track, and like the song without bass. Eventually i may experiment with the addition of the instrumentation, but i've grown to love the cold and winding nature of the "empty" track and expect that out of all of the tracks i've gotten used to being unfinished, this one will be the most resistent to change. Although it captures the essence i always felt of the initial demo (with the solo exiled-drummer-boy marching drums and the twangy and noodling guitars), the execution as a haunting and hidden outro to the album is exactly how i'd envisioned it.
1913 and
Calico, although having been recorded to the same extent as the tracks that actually made it to the album, never quite jived with me. Having had time to think about it, i believe that in my mind, the ultimate versions of both of those songs had already been recorded, and that these newer versions, although technically more solid (with the use of a click track for
1913, and with an increased tempo and updated composition for
Calico), somehow lacked the passion of the earlier recordings that represented their signature sounds (on the
1913 video and
Threnody EP respectively). I think it was simply the case that these songs had peaked and should have been left to lie as they were. I might be interested in someday finishing these tracks, but this interest is nothing compared to the desire i have to finish the others.
So that's about it. This is the one that never happened; my white whale. Actually, it's more like the mother that died giving birth, except the story is even sadder, as the baby here never quite made it. I wanted so badly to do this thing right, as i felt it would be the album that made a name for Softer. I firmly believe that this would be the first release the band would ever have that captured us in our moment; all of our previous efforts having showed up late or never even made it to release on account of being out of date. I still feel bittersweet about the record; although i'm excited to this day about its potential, i am reminded every time i listen about how it played a major part in my departure from the band. Had everything not gone to hell in the spring of 2004, i expect the band would be alive and well today as a full 5-piece, with
The Hunger Artist solidly holding ground as the first truly legitimate release in our catalog. Ah well...
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